There used to be a popular board game called Life. In some ways it was similar to Monopoly, but the goal was not just asset wealth, but getting one's life together by going to school, getting a job, and having a family. I used to play this game religiously as a kid. I tend to get obsessed with things and their wheel made a lil click click when it spun which I loved.
In some ways, I suppose the game of Life was a form of indoctrination. It taught that the way to have a life was to do things in the right order. To make good and sensible choices. But maybe they're wrong. Maybe a life is whatever you make of it. Maybe there is no recipe or right or wrong way.
In fact, maybe the path to a perfect life is actually subverting the norm and choosing your own unique path and way.
I've been thinking about this a lot. About how I've followed a traditional path in some ways. It definitely didn't start out that way. It took me years and years to get through college after taking my GED. I waitressed my way through school, lived on my own and was very independent. But once I finally transferred to UCR, I was pretty traditional. Two years to get my bachelors, three years at USC Law, then six years in big law firm litigation. Now I have fifteen years in at the public defender, a government job. I got married to my long time boyfriend. We've been together forever. And even though we couldn't have kids, we have a nice stable life.
So where do I go now is the question? Where is life leading me? Should I follow that perfect, but ordinary and narrow path? Or should I find my own way? Should I? Dare I?
I've been praying to the universe to show me the way. Hoping for change and that something big will happen. Wishing for a door to open and a light to turn on. I think to myself that maybe, just maybe, the sun will shine bright on me. In this game called Life.
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