Panorama of San Bernardino

Wednesday, August 16, 2023

Staying the path

This morning, I'm drinking my espresso and giving some gratitude to the universe. This month has started off grand. School is starting and although I am only taking one class (a workshop with Professor Juyanne James), I know it will be both fun and low key. I also just received a grant and had a panel accepted with a bunch of my favorite writers for AWP in Kansas City. 

Now I am not a Pollyanna at all, but everything is going so well. It's a little scary. They say when you find your purpose, life is easy. And right now it is. Even my work as a deputy public defender, which everyone knows can be challenging at best, has been particularly rewarding. It's as if I found my mojo.

The trick, at least in my opinion, is finding your groove and just going with the flow. I've pulled back on events a bit. I am trying not to overwhelm myself, which is what I tend to do, and staying true to me and my mission. 

Just a few years ago, I was in crisis, plagued by health issues and feeling like I would never finish my longer book which I'd been laboring over for a decade. I had to take a medical leave from work and have a very invasive surgery. Thankfully, my publisher Frank was very supportive and gave me more time, and then I re-edited the book (working backwards) and at the last minute I included some older poetry (from a collection I'd put together and stuck in a drawer), making both of my books hybrid. It was as if a higher power intervened to help me over the finish line and poof, it all came together! 

I suppose what I'm saying is don't give up. It may be a cliche, but it really is always darkest before the dawn. The sun will rise and throw big golden hues your way if you persevere. Just stay on the path and I promise you'll get there. You will get there. You will.


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