My world has turned so small in ways. At the house, it's me, my husband and my mother in law. Oh and my two shih tzus. I see my best friend occasionally for lunch outside and have my mom over for a sleepover once a week.
But, my life is also bigger in some ways. I have my podcast and my online grad school which, when coupled with my more than full time job, keeps me very busy.
Although I dabble with reading for class on Wednesday and Friday nights, Saturday is my homework day. I down a couple espressos so I am extra focused. I usually start early, at 6 am. I'm only taking one class so I am keeping up. This Saturday, I started at 7 am and was finished by 1 pm. Adrian is learning not to talk to me when I'm doing my homework because I can be curt when bothered.
This Saturday, I was able to get a week ahead. All of the discipline I put into becoming an organized lawyer is paying dividends with my MFA in creative writing. I worked on the two pieces I am submitting next week for workshop and plan on letting them sit for a couple of days.
The best writing marinates. I'll go back to them on Wednesday, them submit them early. Deadlines are calming for me. My calendar on my phone is full of them.
I can't help but think back pre-pandemic when my world seemed so big.
My husband and I had recently traveled to France. I can still taste the chocolate and pistachio croissants at the French bakery by my cousin's house. In my mind's eye, I picture myself walking through the Louvre, peering at books at the Shakespeare and Company bookstore in Paris and having high tea at the Ritz.
In February, we had met all my sisters in Mexico for a long weekend and if I concentrate hard enough, I can almost hear the crowd cheering as we watched the half-time Super Bowl show at a bar with my sisters and our husbands. I miss bars and concerts the most I think.
Yet, is my life any less fulfilling? I am going for my passions. Turning toward them, grabbing at them. Life still whizzes by in an instant and you must be present and conscious to catch the precious moments as they fly by.
What I'm saying in a rather long-winded way is to gather your rosebuds my friends, however you can and however you may. Create a garden in your mind and heart. There's an old cliche that rings true here: home is where the heart is. And yours is beating right now, right where you are.
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