Sun

So yesterday was a rough day at work. Yet it was exhilarating too. But it was exhausting and by that I mean, come home at 6:30 pm and take advil and go straight to bed exhausting. I fought and won a couple of big issues, yes, but that wasn't what was tiring. What made me some damn fatigued at the end of the day was all of the energy it took from me. It drained me like a vampire. I felt like I gave at least 5 pints of my blood.

I had more difficult (and patience requiring) cases in one day than I've had in years. It was a perfect storm of events. But the good news is, I wasn't alone. I had so much help and so many offers of help. It was nice. 

At the end of my work day, which just kept on going and going, I swear the universe wouldn't let me leave the office, I sighed. I thought, I still got it. Now I just need to replenish my energies because tomorrow is a new day. I can continue to fight the good fight. And win. 

By the way, every morning, I think, here comes the sun.

Today today today

Last post was a little dark. I have been in a bit of a funk. I was perseverating on everything. I miss my dad, I can't have kids, my dog is sick, work is overwhelming and school is too much. All the negativity was just hanging over me like my very own dark cloud. My moods would change from happy to irritated in a second.

But then, I just started laughing. Humor really is the very best medicine. I laughed when I got stuck in traffic, and when I lost my phone, then my keys, for what felt like the fiftieth time, and I even chuckled when I hit my car door on my garage at work. 

When you're in your fifties, I think it's easy to get down. To let the day to day drag you under the sea. It's important to remember to break through the waves and breathe. And breathe again. I saw my great nephew on Sunday and was reminded that youth is also a panacea to getting older, and watching him run around a playground reminded me to remember that a little kid is still inside each of us. 

I guess what I'm saying is that life can change in an instant. I know this. So I just need to appreciate the now, and the today. That might even be my mantra this week. When I get stressed out, I'll say it under my breath three times and click my heels: today, today, today. 

Dusty grave

It's a dusty grave

Too dusty of a grave

A dusty grave

I have my flowers 

Not gladiolus no lilies 

You were a simple man

Carnations and daisies 

A sunflower in the middle

For good measure

Kneeling in the dirt 

A salty tear

Lands in the grit 

I say "hi dad"

I miss you

I sure do

Words don't suffice 

They sure don't 

You'd be 88 today

You said I'd miss you

And I sure do 

All I see is glare

The sun shining 

so bright it hurts 

On your dusty grave