Crisis

I've had some crisis of faith, namely, a lack of faith in myself lately. I've been questioning my self, my performing and my writing skills. Wondering if I'm doing too much, reaching too high, over extending myself. Then I took a breath and let myself settle in. What am I looking for? External validation?

The reality is, not everyone will see me or you or any of us. You really just have to believe in what you're doing. And I promise that if you keep on working at it, miracles happen.

For example, take the screenwriting. It's not easy. I'm on draft 5 of my outline for my pilot. And I'm just starting to understand the genre. 

The thing I realized is that I just have to let myself get to that secret place of mine where all my stories, truth or fiction, live, and write. The genre and format may be different, but my process is the same. Truth is, I have never been an organized writer. I'm a "writing by the seat of my pants writer" as a writing professor friend of mine would say.

Sometimes, I also realize that I need too much validation and I need to let that go. I just need to do me, be me, and let the ego go. 

The one thing I know for sure is who I am. And I like me. I like my life. I love the performing and writing life I've built out a mix of of thin air, hope, dreams, my words and some pieces of paper stapled together. 

In the end, I may not be the perfect package. But I'm me.